In today’s world, there is a lot of pressure placed on parents with
the emphasis on “no conflict” parenting. This is a particularly
heavy weight to bear when you are attempting to
parent post-divorce. Is the elimination of parental conflict after separation or divorce even
realistic? Even in the best of circumstances, it can seem impossible,
but what about those parents who have undergone a particularly bitter
divorce or legal separation?
If you are struggling to maintain a conflict free zone for your children
post-divorce the first step is to pinpoint where the parental conflict
starts. The decisions that you make today may have a big impact on your
future attempts to avoid conflict on behalf of your children and yourself.
You deserve some peace, too. Consider these tips on how to reduce parenting
conflict during and after divorce or legal separation:
Tip #1: Avoid using the children as leverage during
separation or divorce.
Tip #2: Do not engage in parental gatekeeping, parental alienation, false
allegations of abuse or neglect, willfully disrupting or preventing the
other parent from spending or enjoying their time with the children, or
violations of court orders regarding parenting time and legal decision making.
*The above behaviors all have one thing in common and that is: intention.
The intention of all these behaviors is the same: to frustrate the other
parent or to harm the other parent’s relationship with the children.
Tip #3: Do not allow a lack of respect for your ex to evolve into a hostile
conflict. Disrespect comes from many different sources, but some of the
more popular reasons include: infidelity in the marriage, failure to provide
necessary financial support, a perception of the other parent’s
parenting skills as lacking, perception of the other parent as having
“broken” up the family. A lack of respect can very thoroughly
remove all ability to co-parent or even communicate effectively. Communication
is often disturbed by hostile tones with a resistance to dialogue and
a lack of willingness to solve problems when they arise.
Parental conflict, like any other journey, starts with one single step.
The first step towards parental conflict is based on unhealthy and unmanaged
emotion, a poor reaction, lack of foresight or simply impulsivity. Stay
in control and approach your divorce with a positive attitude. Contact
the Arizona divorce attorneys at
Arizona Family Law Attorneys.